Bad Disney Attractions Without IPs

Jumpin Jellyfish Disney California Adventure

A common complaint about new Disney rides is how they are just shoving IPs (Intelectual Properties) into places they don't belong for no reason more than to include that film in the parks. Lands from Pandora World of Avatar to Pixar Pier have faced this complaint and the backlash was strong enough that the CEO of Disney Bob Iger was recently forced to amend a statement many fans took to be insulting Expedition Everest for not being related to Disney characters.

But in honesty, not all original attractions in the Disney Parks are great. In fact, some are just plain bad.

IP is not always the problem. Sometimes it can be when it is forced in beyond a reasonable level, but a bad ride can be based on anything.

Here is a look at some rides not based on any movie that just are not that great, or at least according to Disney's normal standards.

Golden Zephyr

Pixar Pier from the Golden Zephyr Disney California Adventure

Oh boy! Spinning slowly in a metal tube! This ride falls victim to being one of the many lightly themed off the shelf rides Disney California Adventure had in its opening year. It offers great views of Paradise Lagoon and Pixar Pier, but not much else. It provides no thrill and doesn't even have music for you to enjoy while riding. Yet somehow it has even outlived its original land.

Kali River Rapids

This had the potential to be a great ride but just comes off feeling like it was half-built. You wanna know why? Because it was! It was originally supposed to be a water version of Kilimanjaro Safari passing by tigers until Disney realized that tigers can swim and boats can't just stop on a moving river like trucks can on land. The result was a water ride with one drop and minimal scenery.

Mission Space: Green

Mission Space

Mission Space: Orange may be the most intense thrill ride Disney has ever made. It also gets a lot of undeserved hate for replacing Horizons. Don't get me wrong, Horizons was a thousand times better ride and Mission Space is by no means the best Disney ride, but it still doesn't deserve all the negativity of Horizons closing. The Orange version is a solid D-ticket ride, and so was Green for most of its history. Then a new film premiered for green where all you do is orbit the Earth. It is significantly worse than Orange and makes this version feel inferior if you have ridden orange or the old less intense version of it.

Chester and Hester's Dinorama

Chester and Hesters Dinorama Sign Disney's Animal Kingdom

This may be the strangest one on the list. This is a section of Dinoland U.S.A. literally themed to a parking lot. There are fake parking lines on the ground covered partially by the attractions and shops. The land also has a way to in-depth backstory for how bad the land really is. The music loop is stuck on cheesy Dino themed pop music (Bad to the Bone-get it?). It features two rides, a lightly themed wild mouse coaster called Primeval Whirl and a dino-themed Dumbo named TricereTop Spin. It feels cheap because it was built cheap and pales in comparison to better rides in the park like Flight of Passage or Expedition Everest.

Jumpin' Jellyfish

This features many of the same problems as the Golden Zephyr. It also has one of the strangest voiceovers of any Disney ride. It pretends to be a drop ride, but you barely go any faster on the way down than your slow journey up. It's also one of the shortest rides at the park so you can't even enjoy the view for as long. It's fine for kids but that's about it.

Jumpin Jellyfish Sign Disney California Adventure

So what do you think? Did I miss any? Think something should be taken off the list? Let me know in the comments.